why am i always floating somewhere else, somewhere far off
unsatisfied with where i am
not seeing the human beings in front of me as beautiful souls, every one
a glowing, bulging life
why am i unsatisfied with the walls of this place, the parking lot and grey gate
that traps me and reminds me that the bell’s about to ring
why can’t i create an experience in this room,
a whirlwind of learning
of intricate stories from our past
why is this stale and lifeless to me
maybe it’s the cold
am i doing what i love? where am i…
i love working with youth
why?
i’m not done growing yet i guess…
i’m not done experiencing and living..
that’s what i’m struggling with perhaps….
i’m not ready to be the authority now, i want to still be experiencing and thinking.. i still want to be self indulgent
